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  3. 22/12/2017

Articles Page 4

Articles Page 4

  1. Don’t hate the player, hate the game.
  2. Distance makes the heart grow fonder.
  3. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
  4. Dead fish go with the flow… but I’m not dead yet.
  5. Draw a circle not a heart cause a heart can break but a circle goes on forever.
  6. Don’t piss in your own pool.
  7. Does a one legged duck swim in a circle.
  8. Don’t lick Bell End.
  9. People can have fun while others are not having fun.
  10. Don’t aim for success. If you want it, just do what you love and believe in, and it will come naturally!
  11. Effort makes the man – ask any woman.
  12. Eschew Obfuscation! Espouse Elucidation!
  13. Everything’s better with butter.
  14. We’re all a lot better for butter.
  15. Everything tastes better when it’s free.
  16. Even “impossible” says I’m possible!
  17. Even the mighty oak tree was just a little nut once, just like you.
  18. Every dog has his day.
  19. Everything is possible. The impossible just takes longer.
  20. Eat right. Exercise regularly. Die anyway.
  21. Every song ends, but that’s not a reason to not enjoy music.
  22. Experience is the hardest kind of teacher. It gives you the test first, and the lesson afterward.
  23. Faith is a journey, not a guilt trip.
  24. Faith is antonymous with logic.
  25. Faith is the opposite of logic.
  26. Fate is only for those unable to control their own futures.
  27. Few women admit their age. Fewer men act theirs.
  28. Fire it up, light it up, smoke it up.
  29. First Deserve, then desire.
  30. Five out of four people have problems with fractions.
  31. For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.
  32. For the common man can do nothing: The fact he undertakes the task makes him uncommon.
  33. Forgive and forget.
  34. Form is temporary. Class is permanent.
  35. Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
  36. Friends come and go, but a good enemy lasts forever.
  37. Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
  38. Friendship is like peeing in your pants: Everyone can see it but only you can feel its warmth.
  39. For every negative in life, there is a greater positive.
  40. Friends come and go, but enemies are here forever.
  41. Freedom is not free.
  42. Freedom isn’t free.
  43. Freedom comes at a cost hope is free.
  44. Friends are like a four leaf clover,hard to find but good to have.
  45. Get with it or get lost.
  46. Getting lost is not a bad thing its just not that good either.
  47. Gimme some of that Goon.
  48. Go big or go home.
  49. Go hard or go home.
  50. Go big or don’t go at all.
  51. Good friends are like stars — you don’t always see them, but you know they are always there.
  52. Good things come to those who wait.
  53. Government philosophy: If it ain’t broke, fix it ’til it is.
  54. Greatest gift one man can give another; the awesome responsibility of freedom.
  55. Grass is greener on the other side, but you’ll eventually have to mow it.
  56. Grass is greener on the other side.
  57. Greed is the mother of all sins.
  58. Great minds think alike.
  59. Fools seldom differ.
  60. Guitars are like speeches, they must be in tune.
  61. God save the Queen.
  62. God save the Queen! God knows Why!
  63. Great ideas are like diamonds; hard to find, not too useful, and impossible to hold onto.
  64. Half the work done in the world is there to deceive you.
  65. Happiness is being married to your best friend.
  66. Have you seen my hexokinase?
  67. Have you seen Mike Hawk?
  68. He that fights and runs away, May live to fight another day.
  69. He who is silent speaks volumes.
  70. He who laughs last laughs longest.
  71. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
  72. He who listens is he who truly speaks.
  73. He’s got bubbles in his think tank.
  74. He’s as sharp as a beach ball.
  75. Here goes everything.
  76. Here goes nothing.
  77. Hire the best, keep the best.
  78. History is just one bloody thing after another.
  79. History shows that life is the cheapest commodity.
  80. History is like your social Security number. long, useless, but needed.
  81. History is not about who’s right. It’s about who’s left.
  82. Homophobia is gay.
  83. Home is where you make it.
  84. Home is where the heart is.
  85. Home is where your hat is.
  86. Home is where your hump is.
  87. Home is where your dump is.
  88. Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.
  89. Hoping for the best but expecting the worst.
  90. Hold my beer and watch this!
  91. How long is a piece of string?
  92. I always mean what I say but I don’t always say what I mean.
  93. I am not a National Insurance Number, I am a free man!
  94. I am nothing, not even hope.
  95. I can tune a guitar, but I can’t tüna fish.
  96. I don’t fear death; it’s re-incarnation I dread.
  97. I do not forgive!
  98. I don’t have an attitude problem: you have a perception problem!
  99. I don’t need your attitude, I have one of my own!
  100. I don’t suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it!
  101. I don’t understand women, if someone said to me “go home and make babies” it would make my day.
  102. I have the body of a god. Specifically, Buddha.
  103. I know very well that beauty is empty. But I want it anyway.
  104. I may look stupid but dont let it it foool you i is smmart. by.
  105. I only made one mistake in my life; that’s when I thought I was wrong.
  106. I’m not as think as you drunk I am.
  107. It’s the horse you are the most unwilling to ride that will take you the furthest.
  108. It’s only money, we’ve got plenty of it.
  109. It is easier to create naked art than it is to create clothed porn.
  110. I was born intelligent. But, education ruined me.
  111. I wasn’t always this fat – blame it on inflation.
  112. I would insult you, but you’re not bright enough.
  113. I’m in shape. Round is a shape.
  114. I’m not trying to be cheeky, because if I was you’d know about it.
  115. I think, therefore, I thunk!
  116. I like to be at the base/bottom of a pyramid. So i can say to the one at the top that I will leave if I want…
  117. In God we trust. The rest must pay cash.
  118. If I had liked you in the first place, I’d have gone off you by now.
  119. If I had that nose full of nickels, I’d be a rich man.
  120. If intelligence had anything to do with the voting process, then all the smart people would vote the same.
  121. If a man speaks in a forest, but no woman is around to hear him, is he still wrong?
  122. If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
  123. If at first you don’t succeed – give up!
  124. If at first you don’t succeed, look in the trash for the instructions.
  125. If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving’s not for you!
  126. If at first you don’t succeed, others do so at your expense.
  127. If it’s worth fighting for…it’s worth fighting dirty for.
  128. If I’m going down I’m taking somebody with me.
  129. If the left half of the brain controls the right hand, and the right half the left, then left-handed people are the only ones in their right minds.
  130. If the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off.
  131. If you can’t appreciate it, you don’t deserve it.
  132. If you can’t convince, confuse!
  133. If you don’t know where your going you’ll never get there.
  134. If your enemy needs a friend, buy him a dog.
  135. If you get knocked off your horse, you get right back in the saddle.
  136. If you go looking for enemies then you will find them — the fucking bastards!
  137. If you think the impossible, the incredible can come true.
  138. If you’re dumb dont talk so you can at least seem smart. Till you forget and say something stupid.
  139. If it is to be it is up to me.
  140. If it looks like there’s nothing to worry about, that’s when you really have to worry.
  141. If you always tell the truth, you never have to rely on your memory.
  142. I intend to live forever – so far, so good!
  143. I’m immortal … so far.
  144. I’m pink, therefore, I’m spam!
  145. Information is knowledge, knowledge is influence, influence is power.
  146. In every river, the worse the ford the better the fish.
  147. In most instances, all an argument proves is that two people are present.
  148. In one ear, out the other.
  149. Isn’t there a medicine for that?
  150. Is your journey really necessary?
  151. It always feels better to walk on the path you made yourself.
  152. It doesn’t matter what actually happened, the only thing that matters is what people think happened.
  153. It is difficult to understand how a pyramid is built from sitting on the top of it.
  154. It is not ignorance that is the problem, but the illusion of knowledge.
  155. It’s a dog eat dog world.
  156. It’s been a long week today.
  157. It’s not a bug, it’s an undocumented feature.
  158. It’s not cheating, it’s creative sportsmanship.
  159. It’s often not what we say that hurts, but what we don’t say.
  160. It’s only funny until someone gets hurt… Then it’s hilarious.
  161. I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.
  162. If you resist reading what you disagree with, how will you ever acquire deeper insights into what you believe? The things most worth reading are precisely those that challenge our convictions.
  163. If you’re in control, you’re not driving fast enough…
  164. If two people meet and exchange one dollar, both leave with that same one dollar. If two people meet and exchange an idea, both leave with two ideas.
  165. Just get up one more time than you are knocked down.
  166. Just because you’ve always done it that way; doesn’t mean it’s not incredibly stupid.
  167. Keep your mouth shut and your eyes open.
  168. Keep Mum, she’s not so dumb.
  169. Keep on trucking!
  170. Laws are made to be broken.
  171. Let’s deal with Today!
  172. Let his own wand ding him.
  173. Let’s be careful out there.
  174. Life. Live it.
  175. Life is enjoyment, enjoyment is Whiskey, but Whiskey is not life.
  176. Life is a bitch.
  177. Life is a joke.
  178. Life isn’t fair.
  179. Life isn’t fair. — No, it’s not, is it!
  180. Life sucks, then you die.
  181. Life sucks til it stops, the life, not the sucking.
  182. Life is the best thing in the world, those who disprove are fools
  183. Life is terminal.
  184. Life is a terminal disease.
  185. Life is out there, if your doing what you love, and loving what you do.
  186. Life is unsure. Always eat your dessert first.
  187. Life is what you make it
  188. Life is a sexually contracted terminal disease.
  189. Live and let live.
  190. Live life like there’s no tomorrow.
  191. Life is hard, but the alternative is unacceptable.
  192. Logic is the art of going wrong with confidence.
  193. Love is not something you learn, love is something you know but don’t realize until you have it.
  194. Love makes time pass. Time makes love pass.
  195. Love makes the world go ’round.
  196. Love is all you need to love, and love is all you need to be loved.
  197. Love it or shove it.
  198. Love is the only rational act.
  199. Love is sex, but sex isn’t love.
  200. Love of money is the root of all evil.
  201. Love and life can’t be separate.
  202. Life is about everything, but without love it’s nothing.
  203. Life, live, love.
  204. Lie, lonely, lose.
  205. Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
  206. Many hands make light work.
  207. Man has one incurable disease: Ignorance.
  208. Man must shut up, or be shut up.
  209. Misery is the fastest breeding substance in the world.
  210. Man up inside ya!
  211. Miss with the best , die like the rest.
  212. Mocking religion is like mocking handicapped people, even though it’s easy, you just don’t do it.
  213. Most live and learn, but by the time most learn, it is too late to live.
  214. Most citizens are in two minds about traffic wardens: whether they should be taken out and shot at dawn, or at dusk.
  215. Music is Inspiration & Sentiment. These goods cannot be sold but only shared.
  216. My body may be broken, but my spirit still fights on.
  217. My karma ran over your dogma.
  218. My mechanics so good, if he cant fix it, it ain’t broken.
  219. My other badge is enamel.
  220. Money is worthless unless some people have it and others do not.
  221. Mr. Heinz would be happy!!!
  222. Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark; professionals built the Titanic.
  223. Never Drink and drive, you might spill your beer.
  224. Never forget that your tools were made by the lowest bidder.
  225. Never forgive, never forget.
  226. Never look a gift horse in the mouth.
  227. Never count a tiger’s teeth before breakfast.
  228. Never put off doing till tomorrow what you can put off doing today.
  229. Ninety-nine percent of all statistics are made up on the spot (including this one).
  230. No brain, more pain.
  231. No good deed goes unpunished.
  232. No man is an island in Manhattan.
  233. No pain, no gain.
  234. No quarter given, and none received.
  235. Nobody ever said that life is fair.
  236. Nobody’s perfect. I’m Nobody. Therefore, I must be perfect.
  237. Nothing is more certain than the certainty of being uncertain.
  238. Nothing is impossible.
  239. Nothing like a cigarette to remind you you’re alive
  240. Nothing is troublesome that we do willingly.
  241. Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.
  242. Nothing is fool proof.
  243. Nothing to excess.
  244. Obstacles are weights that when time flows, you’ll get used to
  245. One shot, one kill.
  246. One good turn deserves another.
  247. One knows self, knows all.
  248. One cannot write feelings when not in despair.
  249. Out of the frying pan, into the fire.
  250. One smart man is dumber than 7 seven stupid ones.
  251. Only the man who stands can get knocked down with pride.
  252. Open minds and empty heads are not the same.
  253. Oh what a stink of the rot!
  254. Optimist is the one who thinks bullshit is a fertilizer.
  255. Pain is weakness leaving the body.
  256. Pleasure is weakness entering the body.
  257. Pain is ever present, but never ever lasting.
  258. Pain is temporary. Chicks dig scars. Glory is forever.
  259. Pain is your friend; it lets you know that you’re still alive.
  260. Patience is a very tedious virtue.
  261. Patience is a virtue, albeit a tedious one.
  262. People only think I’m wrong because my path of logic is illogical to every logical person.
  263. People in your life will come and go like the ocean tides, but few will leave such an imprint on your soul that it can not be washed away.
  264. People say I shouldn’t frown because it uses more muscles than smiling. Then I point out that Americans need their exercise.
  265. People too weak to follow their own dreams will always find a way to discourage others.
  266. People who run aren’t cowards, just smarter than those who charge.
  267. People who charge are people we remember for being excellent.
  268. Pessimist’s definition of an Optimist: Someone who knows today is so bad, tomorrow has just got to be better.
  269. Pessimists are just realistic optimists.
  270. Pessimists are Optimists with experience.
  271. Perfection is only possible within an imperfect human mold.
  272. Perfect paranoia is perfect awareness.
  273. Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned.
  274. Pink pills for pale people.
  275. Patriotism – There are people in every country who shamelessly hide their corrupt practises and sheer incompetence behind their country’s flag.
  276. Physical prowess is for cowards; a little pain builds character.
  277. Power is the ability not to have to please.
  278. Power is the way to fulfill absolute corruption and greed.
  279. Practice does not make perfect. Perfect practice makes perfect.
  280. Practice makes perfect, and nothing’s perfect, so why practice?
  281. Practice makes permanent.
  282. Practice makes better!
  283. Practice makes perfect.
  284. Practice may make perfect, but perfection does not mean you don’t need to practice.
  285. Practice what you preach.
  286. Praise undeserved is scandal in disguise.
  287. Pray for what you want. Work for what you need.
  288. Preference is vanity.
  289. Procrastinate later.
  290. Promotion is one’s growth at the cost of another.
  291. Proper preparation prevents piss-poor performance.
  292. Proper planning and preparation prevents piss-poor performance.
  293. Put your Crocodile in adventure mode.
  294. Quick action in emergencies saves lives, push up to the front of the line.
  295. Question everything, accept nothing.
  296. Question it if it’s free.
  297. Quotation is a serviceable substitute for wit; adaptation, even more so.
  298. For him that stealeth, or borroweth and returneth not, this book from its owner, let it change into a serpent in his hand and rend him. Let him be struck with palsy, and all his members blasted. Let him languish in pain, crying aloud for mercy, and let there be no surcease to this agony till he sing in dissolution. Let bookworms gnaw his entrails…and when at last he goeth to his final punishment, let the flames of Hell consume him forever.
  299. Reach for the stars, or you’ll never touch the sky.
  300. Real programmers don’t comment their code. If it was hard to write it should be hard to understand.
  301. Realists are just pessimists looking for an excuse for themselves.
  302. Reality is a poor substitute for my dreams.
  303. Reality is for people who can’t handle drugs.
  304. Reality is a crutch for people who can’t handle drugs.
  305. Remember, people will judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold–but so does a hard-boiled egg.
  306. Remember the Alamo!
  307. Right or Wrong is always dependent on the context.
  308. Rome wasn’t built in a day.
  309. There is no such thing as excessive firepower. There is only open fire and reload.
  310. Satisfaction is the death of desire.
  311. Satisfaction come at the cost of desire.
  312. Say what you mean, mean what you say.
  313. Say something wise and your name will live forever.
  314. Say something stupid and your name will be remembered for forever and a day.
  315. Scientific progress goes “Boink”.
  316. Some say knowledge is the best virtue, I say stupidity is
  317. See ya, wouldn’t wanna be ya.
  318. See ya later, alligator! After a while, crocodile!
  319. See you some other never.
  320. Seeing is believing.
  321. Seek and you shall find.
  322. Self do, self have.
  323. Shit happens.
  324. Shift happens.
  325. Stuff happens.
  326. Santa happens.
  327. Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you will still be among the stars.
  328. Shop ’til you drop!
  329. Should have, would have, could have but didn’t.
  330. Simple programming languages are bad because they are easy.
  331. Sit down, and shut up!
  332. Successful leaders have the courage to take action where others hesitate.
  333. Coulda, woulda, Shoulda.
  334. Since light travels faster than sound, isn’t that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
  335. So close, and yet so far away.
  336. Some people are born lucky, some make their own luck.
  337. Someday we will look back on this and laugh.
  338. Sometimes, it just takes a pirate to get the job done.
  339. Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me.
  340. Stupid people shouldn’t breed.
  341. Smart people make problems in the world, stupid people fix them.
  342. Stupidity is permanent; ignorance can be fixed.
  343. Superficially, an aphorist is a bit like a philatelist, only he’ll never admit it.
  344. Support your right to arm bears.
  345. This Christmas, buy your children glue.
  346. Take a lesson from the whale; the only time he gets speared is when he raises to spout.
  347. Take all risks for not the day come saying what IF !
  348. Talent does what it can; genius does what it must.
  349. Talk is cheap when the story’s good.
  350. Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.
  351. Writing about music is like dancing about architecture.
  352. Writing about art is like dancing about architecture.
  353. Talking about architecture is like dancing about architecture.
  354. Tall trees catch more wind.
  355. Temptation is seen from a distance never near.
  356. The apotheosis of nihilism is suicide.
  357. The average girl would rather have beauty than brains because she knows the average guy can see better than he can think.
  358. The beatings will continue until morale improves.
  359. The best defense against logic is ignorance.
  360. The best friends you will ever have are the ones who are there when everything is not perfect.
  361. The best prophet of the future is the past.
  362. The best thing to give to your enemy is forgiveness; to an opponent, tolerance; to a friend, your heart; to your child, a good example; to a father, deference; to your mother, conduct that will make her proud of you; to yourself, respect; to all men, charity.
  363. The world isn’t perfect…but that’s why it’s beautiful.
  364. The bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of an expanding bureaucracy.
  365. The customer is always right, except when he’s dead wrong.
  366. The death of three civilians and a dog causes uproar and sadness. The death of 20,000 soldiers causes dissatisfaction.
  367. The devil makes work for idle thumbs.
  368. The devil makes work for idle hands.
  369. The devil we know is better than the devil we don’t.
  370. The devil’s greatest trick was convincing the world that he didn’t exist.
  371. The devil’s greatest trick was convincing the world that God exists.
  372. The Eclectic Rede: Keep What Works, Fix What’s Broke, Dump the Rest.
  373. The eternal triangle.
  374. The family that prays together stays together.
  375. The First Impression Is Not The Last Impression, But A Lasting Impression
  376. The first victim of anger is the angry man.
  377. The graffito’s on the wall!
  378. The hardest thing to raise in my garden is my knees.
  379. The glass is neither half-full nor half-empty; the glass is twice as big as it should be.
  380. The goal of science is to build better mousetraps. The goal of nature is to build better mice.
  381. The greatest thing you’ll ever learn, is just to love and be loved in return.
  382. The greatest trick a writer ever played upon his readers was to convince them that he was telling the truth when he wrote, “Honestly, I tell you no lies!”
  383. The impossible is always possible.
  384. The line between what is right and what is wrong is thin and indistinct. It takes true character to discern between the two.
  385. The meaning of life is anything you want it to be, because if something hasn’t got an answer how can you answer be wrong?
  386. The more you sweat in training, the less you bleed in battle.
  387. The one that can describe feelings best is the one without emotion.
  388. The only tme the music is too loud is when your ears start bleeding.
  389. The only concealed weapon is a man’s mind.
  390. The only lesson history has taught us is that man has not yet learned anything from history.
  391. The only problem with subtlety is that it is too subtle.
  392. The only thing in life achieved without effort is failure.
  393. The only time you have too much fuel is when you are on fire.
  394. The only perfect lie is one that even the liar don’t know the answer to.
  395. The perfect lie is one that can even deceive the liar.
  396. The plural of anecdote is not data.
  397. The problem with society is that one man can achieve more than a thousand others.
  398. The proof of the pudding is in the eating.
  399. The straw that broke the camel’s back.
  400. The sincerest love is satirized by the sincerest liars.
  401. The sun shines brighter in the wake of tragedy.
  402. The thinner the book, the thicker the person.
  403. The things we remember best are those better forgotten.
  404. The thing our parents’ generation doesn’t get, is that if you kick ass on the internet, people will find you.
  405. The whole is greater than the sum of the parts.
  406. The world is big again.
  407. The world would be less violent if everyone used hula hoops.
  408. The WAY I walk is the WAY.
  409. There are only 3 truths in this world: My truth, your truth and THE TRUTH.
  410. There are only 10 types of people in the world; those who understand binary and those who don’t.
  411. There are three types of people in this world: the ones who can count, and those who can’t.
  412. There are three types of people in this world: the ones who keep you alive, the ones who would otherwise cause you to die, and the ones who somehow manage to do both at the same time.
  413. There are three types of people in the world: Those who get things done, those who watch things getting done, and those who wonder what’s going on.
  414. There are two types of people in the world: Chuck Norris and people that suck.
  415. There are two types of people in the world: Those who sort people into different categories, and those who don’t.
  416. There are two types of people in the world; the people who control it, and the people that should.
  417. There are two types of people that go around beardless; boys and women, and I am neither.
  418. There is a fine line between coincidence and fate.
  419. There is a fine line between stupid and clever
  420. There is always one more idiot than you counted on.
  421. There is no I in team, unless you spell it that way.
  422. There is no I in team, but there is in win, and there’s a u in suck.
  423. There is no need to fear the dead. Only fear the living.
  424. There is nothing that you can’t do, only things that you want to or not.
  425. There is something about a cupboard that makes a skeleton terribly restless.
  426. They would have failed if they were on Expert.
  427. Think of it this way, in a 1000 years who’s gonna care?
  428. Think of the Web as a big bathroom wall. And everyone has a marker.
  429. Those who don’t make decisions never make mistakes.
  430. Those who fight and run away, live to fight another day.
  431. Those who reject advice are those who need it the most.
  432. Those who say that violence is the answer never understood the question.
  433. Those who say that violence isn’t the answer understood the question.
  434. Those who suppress freedom always do so in the name of law and order.
  435. Thoughts don’t hurt, actions do.
  436. Time flies like the wind, but fruit flies like bananas.
  437. Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana. But what are timeflies and why do they like an arrow?
  438. Time flies when you’re having fun.
  439. Time files when you don’t care about it.
  440. Times change, and we change with them.
  441. Togetherness only through crisis.
  442. To ignore the past is to jeopardize the future.
  443. To live, is to die.
  444. To refuse praise is to seek praise twice.
  445. Too much phone sex will give you hearing AIDS.
  446. Treat a person as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat him as he could be, and he will become what he should be.
  447. Treat criticism as your friend.
  448. True power comes from knowledge. Knowledge comes from understanding.
  449. Take control of your own destiny.
  450. They condemn what they do not understand.
  451. Trust God, check all others.
  452. The Law of Gravity states that what comes up, must come down. That’s why I don’t invest in the Stock Market.
  453. There’s no smoke without fire.
  454. Turnabout is fair play.
  455. The next best thing to playing and winning is playing and losing.
  456. The best and worst thing about Time is that it passes by.
  457. Those most willing to give others a piece of their mind can least afford to do so.
  458. The difference between successful and unsuccessful man is not the lack of strength or knowledge, it’s the lack of WILL POWER.
  459. Two wrongs don’t make a right, but three lefts do.
  460. To forget is disgraceful, to forgive is true strength.
  461. To care for things when others don’t care, that’s what makes you human.
  462. The best things in life are free. The second best are very expensive
  463. Understanding someone is better than words sometimes.
  464. Underpromise and overdeliver.
  465. Violence is not the answer.
  466. War is not the answer.
  467. Violence isn’t the answer, but it’s a bloody good guess.
  468. Wars are where old men talk and young men die.
  469. Wars are always fought for old men by young boys.
  470. We fucked that midget, Sam. Fucked’em all nite long, and not just traditional.
  471. We all have wings. Heaven is just VIP.
  472. We are not meant to be good, we are just meant to exist.
  473. We will fight them until hell freezes over. Then, we’ll fight them on ice.
  474. Whatever happens for a reason, happens.
  475. What drives you? Is it a Mini or a Thunderbird?
  476. Whatever you do, do cautiously, and look to the end.
  477. What is popular is not always right; what is right is not always popular.
  478. What’s the officer problem?
  479. When you meet a stranger, give them a smile. It may be the only sunshine they see all day.
  480. When the going gets tough, America goes to the bar.
  481. When the shit hits the fan, and osama bin laden is found, when there is a snowball fight in hell, and animal control has to buy planes to catch the pigs in the sky, that’s when I might consider listening to whatever the hell it is you’re saying.
  482. When your father says “Do I look stupid?”, don’t answer.
  483. When someone says they don’t care it means they care very much.
  484. Where patience fails, force prevails.
  485. Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.
  486. Who ever said nothings impossible obviously never tried slamming a revolving door.
  487. Whom the gods wish to destroy, they first make mad.
  488. Whom gods destroy they first make mad.
  489. Whom Jupiter wishes to destroy he first sends mad.
  490. Whom the gods would destroy they first make mad—but they don’t bother about the working classes.
  491. Why be difficult when you can be impossible?
  492. Why bother making cookies if your just going to shit them out?
  493. Why buy the cow when the milk is free?
  494. Why buy it when you can build it for twice as much.
  495. Why do you try to fit in when you are born to stand out?
  496. Wikipedia has changed the way the world gets information forever.
  497. Winners never quit, and quitters never win.
  498. Without education, we are in horrible and deadly danger of taking educated people seriously.
  499. Wise men make proverbs. Fools repeat them.
  500. Wise men speak because they have something to say, fools speak because they have to say something.
  501. Women can fake orgasms, men can fake the whole relationships.
  502. Where there’s smoke there’s fire.
  503. Where there’s smoke, they pinch back.
  504. Who’s been stealing my icecreams.
  505. Write a wise saying and your name will live forever.
  506. Xenophobia is alien to me.
  507. Xylophones are like humans – there can be all kinds of notes and personalities.
  508. You can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your enemies.
  509. You can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you can’t fool all of the people all of the time.
  510. You can go off people you know.
  511. You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink.
  512. You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead.
  513. You can lead a horse to water, but don’t fiddle with it… that’s just weird.
  514. You can eat your cake and have it too.
  515. You can have your cake and eat it too.
  516. You cannot mistake happenings as inconveniences always, you have to sit and think about how you can benefit from it.
  517. You have no rights. Sit down.
  518. You cannot use your friends and have them too.
  519. You can’t put a better bit of butter on you knife!
  520. You can’t predict the future, but you can prepare for it.
  521. You can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can’t pick your friend’s nose.
  522. You get what you pay for, and you pay for what you get.
  523. You gotta move on to groove on.
  524. You have more luck than brains.
  525. You’re only worth as much as your promises are.
  526. You know what they say, whitewater in the morning.
  527. You’re bad bad, but he(/she) is Great!
  528. He(/She) is not bad, but You are great!
  529. You’re unique. Just like everyone else.
  530. Your village called… they want their idiot back.
  531. Your head is not aerodynamically proportioned.
  532. Your last word is another man’s target.
  533. Facebook meta tags
  534. How to make Yahoo your homepage in Chrome
  535. Acer Iconia Talk S Specs
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  540. TV9 News Telangana Andhra Pradesh WhatsApp Number Contact Address
  541. Facebook and Twitter challenging Google plus via custom URL free to change
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  547. Move YouTube channel subscribers to another channel
  548. ‘I Spy’ represents the absence of the tension of the black man or black woman or anyone of that color walking in, so that the white racist person can become entertaining to a viewer.
  549. ‘The Cosby Show’ made an impact on comedy, television and culture. We rejected lowering the bar.
  550. A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he’s in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.
  551. A word to the wise ain’t necessary – it’s the stupid ones that need the advice.
  552. According to the State of Florida, the person with the gun has the right to defend him or herself.
  553. All around the United States of America – in the cities and the counties – our public education is suffering and has been suffering. Cuts, cuts, cuts.
  554. All parents experience the same problems.
  555. Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.
  556. Any man today who returns from work, sinks into a chair, and calls for his pipe is a man with an appetite for danger.
  557. As I have discovered by examining my past, I started out as a child. Coincidentally, so did my brother. My mother did not put all her eggs in one basket, so to speak: she gave me a younger brother named Russell, who taught me what was meant by ‘survival of the fittest.’
  558. Brown versus the Board of Education is no longer the white person’s problem.
  559. By the 1960s, many of us believed that the Civil Rights Movement could eliminate racism in America during our lifetime. But despite significant progress, racism remains.
  560. Civilization had too many rules for me, so I did my best to rewrite them.
  561. Comedy Central is what these young people are viewing. The network speaks to their audience, which is saying, ‘Give me fast jokes. Give me party stories and party language.’
  562. Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.
  563. Did you ever see the customers in health – food stores? They are pale, skinny people who look half – dead. In a steak house, you see robust, ruddy people. They’re dying, of course, but they look terrific.
  564. Education happens to be something that all people, all cultures, need to embrace. Math, science, the words of the world. To be able to speak and be able to have clarity and to be able to think. Those are the greatest of gifts.
  565. Even though your kids will consistently do the exact opposite of what you’re telling them to do, you have to keep loving them just as much.
  566. Every closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing.
  567. Every success story has a parent who says, ‘over my dead body.’ Every success story has an old person who walks up to you and says, when you’re acting the fool, ‘you know I worry about you sometimes.’
  568. Everybody is not a victim.
  569. Family is conflict and it’s something that we all relate to.
  570. Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.
  571. For college seniors there should be a week of being allowed to cry. Just break down and cry because you are scared and don’t know what’s next.
  572. George Booth and I are both funny, and from afar, without meeting, admired each other’s work.
  573. George Carlin is brilliant with words, and Johnny Winters is very creative. It’s taking something common and drawing out the humor, being clever with words.
  574. God has not made anything that I know of that pays so much attention to who their father and mother is as us.
  575. Gray hair is God’s graffiti.
  576. Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit.
  577. Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.
  578. I am certainly not an authority on love because there are no authorities on love, just those who’ve had luck with it and those who haven’t.
  579. I am not going to give in to people who try to exploit me because of my celebrity status.
  580. I am proud to be an American. Because an American can eat anything on the face of this earth as long as he has two pieces of bread.
  581. I can’t negate the theory that the Huxtables on ‘The Cosby Show’ may have helped pave the way for the Obama family. People enjoyed watching that black family.
  582. I cannot understand how the education of this United States of America has been fooled time and time again. Either make it separate but equal or integrate, therefore it will be equal. And it has been separate and unequal.
  583. I don’t care what right-wing white people are thinking.
  584. I don’t have a problem believing in God and Jesus. But in Genesis one has to wonder about these sentences that just go on and end without finishing. The thought is unfinished. Where did Adam go? What is he doing? Hello? There has to be some pages missing.
  585. I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.
  586. I don’t see much comedy in the Bible, where people are writing about funny people. It’s not there.
  587. I don’t spend my hours worrying how to slip a social message into my act.
  588. I don’t think you can bring the races together by joking about the differences between them. I’d rather talk about the similarities, about what’s universal in their experiences.
  589. I got into Temple University on a track scholarship.
  590. I guess the real reason that my wife and I had children is the same reason that Napoleon had for invading Russia: it seemed like a good idea at the time.
  591. I have to follow my thoughts and mine for the gold. I have to dig it out.
  592. I love Twitter, but some people use profanity so much that at some point it’s like saying, ‘Pass the salt.’
  593. I love cake. I love pie. I love potato chips. I love salt. I do not want yogurt, plain yogurt. It’s healthy. ‘Why don’t you like it?’ Because it tastes like bad breath.
  594. I managed my life to the point that at age 19 I was still in high school. I decided I was too old to be walking down those hallways.
  595. I never saw anything funny in a car commercial – but that’s OK. Whatever they wanted to do – it’s their product and I’m the spokesperson, and I’m going to deliver.
  596. I often try to tell kids to think about all the people who love you, don’t cry over the one person who doesn’t.
  597. I see Obama as Sisyphus in the first four years. And nobody would speak about the size of the rock, or the elevation of the hill. All you hear people talk about is what he didn’t do.
  598. I tell stories. Because I believe you can do things that joke tellers can’t do, and that is, bring your audience along.
  599. I think ‘I Spy,’ still when you look at it, speaks volumes in terms of propaganda for equality. It’s just magnificent.
  600. I think I am a good running back, but I’m really not that fast. There is only one thing I can do, that is throw a cross-body block. Picture perfect. I love it. Not that good at pass blocking.
  601. I think if a 30-year-old Bill Cosby sat on stage with a 72-year-old Bill Cosby, they would enjoy each other.
  602. I think the part of media that romanticizes criminal behavior, things that a person will say against women, profanity, being gangster, having multiple children with multiple men and women and not wanting to is prevalent. When you look at the majority of shows on television they placate that kind of behavior.
  603. I use the exercise room early, because I don’t want to get on the treadmill and everyone’s going ‘Oh, Bill Cosby,’ and then they come around to see how fast I’m walking, and it becomes very competitive.
  604. I want all this loud profanity in the street stopped. I want people to think about choices.
  605. I want to get violence – I want schools to start from K through 12 to just every day have teachers understand that they don’t want to talk about anything that is violent, and they want to explain to the children how bad violence is and how behavior – violent behavior, is something that they really should not practice and think about.
  606. I was 23 years old, a freshman at university, and there I was, on the first day, sitting in a remedial English class. I was so ashamed I almost got up and left, but somehow I knew inside that if I ran away from this, I would hate myself forever.
  607. I was put in remedial everything.
  608. I wasn’t always black… there was this freckle, and it got bigger and bigger.
  609. I watch an awful lot of television, and I get a little tired of what I see… We have about six television sets in our house, and it’s less expensive for me to do a television series than it is for me to throw them all out.
  610. I’m a Christian. But Muslims are misunderstood. Intentionally misunderstood. We should all be more like them.
  611. I’m not going out and hitting a 95-mph fastball where I can’t see the stitches. I’m not on a professional football team looking to tackle a fullback who is built like solid wood. I’m a thinking person, and I’ve been blessed with the ability to see some things and talk about them in a way that registers in a humorous and funny way.
  612. I’m not the healthiest, but I am healthy. I’m healthy to the point where there are things that I have to eat that I don’t want to eat, but I eat it because I’m enjoying staying alive.
  613. I’m old, not dead.
  614. I’m one of those who cut off seeing people after a certain time, when the weight is gone and they sound like the dementia is very advanced – I don’t want to see that. I don’t even go in to look at the body. That’s not my last memory.
  615. I’ve always heard about people having a conniption, but I’ve never seen one.
  616. I’ve said all along I’ve never competed with ‘The Simpsons.’ Not in my own mind.
  617. If I didn’t like poor people, why would I come and tell them how to make their lives better?
  618. If I read the small print, and I see that what I love to taste has pantonaponamene or fake smeinlioaimine, then I have to hide in my room when I eat it. I’m still gonna eat it, it’s just gonna be ‘Don’t come in here!’
  619. If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right.
  620. If you have no faith, you’ve lost your battle.
  621. If you have one of the worst schools in the city, then chances are the teachers are not going to care for you. Chances are the parents don’t feel seriously about coming to meet with teachers.
  622. If you speak your mind and if it is true what you’re saying, then I think the integrity of what you’re saying carries through.
  623. If you took your child to the dentist and check for cavities, the child likely won’t get them. If you take them just for emergency, that’s all they’re gonna get.
  624. If you watch kids looking at something on television, even something that’s produced for them and is supposed to be funny, what you’ll notice is that they don’t laugh.
  625. Immortality is a long shot, I admit. But somebody has to be first.
  626. In September of 1960, I was blessed – and I’m not saying blessed in the everyday religious way – when Temple University accepted me after scoring 500 on the SAT. I was 23 years old, and they put me in remedial. I was the happiest remedial person on earth.
  627. In all of my career, the style is still the same, and that is of a friend, just sitting and talking.
  628. In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.
  629. It is a point of pride for the American male to keep the same size Jockey shorts for his entire life.
  630. It isn’t a matter of black is beautiful as much as it is white is not all that’s beautiful.
  631. It was hard for me, being in school. And nobody was there to tell me how important it was.
  632. Karl Malden was a good friend of mine, and he said, ‘You draw the people to you,’ and I guess that’s what I do.
  633. Kids need to remember that when you put something on Twitter, it’s not like whispering to your friend, you’ve put it on a billboard that the whole world, including your own kids someday, can see.
  634. Laughter brings out the child in all of us.
  635. Learning to read clusters is not something your eyes do naturally. It takes constant practice.
  636. Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge.
  637. Like everyone else who makes the mistake of getting older, I begin each day with coffee and obituaries.
  638. Men and women belong to different species and communications between them is still in its infancy.
  639. Most of us learn to read by looking at each word in a sentence – one at a time.
  640. My childhood should have taught me lessons for my own fatherhood, but it didn’t because parenting can only be learned by people who have no children.
  641. My feeling is, personally, I want to die first… because I believe that when you die, your soul goes immediately up for judgment – and I don’t want my wife up there first. No, the judgment will be horrendous.
  642. My observations are not bread crumbs. They do not dissolve. They are on record, on film printed in books, and found on the Internet. I am happy to share them. For this I was born.
  643. No matter how calmly you try to referee, parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I’m not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal.
  644. Nobody asked you to flip burgers for the rest of your life.
  645. Nothing I’ve ever done has given me more joys and rewards than being a father to my children.
  646. Nothing separates the generations more than music. By the time a child is eight or nine, he has developed a passion for his own music that is even stronger than his passions for procrastination and weird clothes.
  647. Now, Richard Pryor was unique. Many misunderstood his humor. He lit up the hallway, but they didn’t understand his use of profanity. He didn’t use it just to be using it; he used it in the context of his satire.
  648. Old is always fifteen years from now.
  649. Our children are angry. The profanity is out in the street. It’s on the buses and in the subway. Our children are trying to tell us something, and we are not listening.Our children are angry. The profanity is out in the street. It’s on the buses and in the subway. Our children are trying to tell us something, and we are not listening.
  650. Parents are people who yell and they yell and they yell and they yell. And you already have the point… and they’re still yelling.
  651. People can be more forgiving than you can imagine. But you have to forgive yourself. Let go of what’s bitter and move on.
  652. People have all kinds of approaches when they come up to me. Some of them are so nervous: ‘You know, Mr. Cosby, you are my biggest fan!’ I am? Some of them even claim that I raised them.
  653. People say children are charming because they tell the truth. That’s a lie. I’ve got five of them. They only tell the truth if they’re in pain.
  654. People say to me, ‘Do you know who you look like?’ And I say, ‘I’m really tired of looking like that guy.’
  655. Poets have said that the reason to have children is to give yourself immortality. Immortality? Now that I have five children, my only hope is that they are all out of the house before I die.
  656. Racial humor was about 35% of my act when I first started. But I realized that it was a crutch. What brought it home was when another comedian said to me, ‘If you changed color tomorrow, you wouldn’t have any material.’ He meant it as a put-down, but I took it as a challenge.
  657. Raising children is an incredibly hard and risky business in which no cumulative wisdom is gained: each generation repeats the mistakes the previous one made.
  658. Reunited with strawberry, raspberry and blueberry, I am berry, berry happy to be back working with JELL-O.
  659. Social networking helps reach people easier and quicker.
  660. Sometimes I buy my wife flowers.
  661. Sometimes you try to help people, and it backfires on you, and then they try to take advantage of you.
  662. Telemarketers tell me I sound like Bill Cosby.
  663. That married couples can live together day after day is a miracle that the Vatican has overlooked.
  664. The absolute truth is that there is no power in celebrity.
  665. The essence of childhood, of course, is play, which my friends and I did endlessly on streets that we reluctantly shared with traffic.
  666. The first-born in every family is always dreaming for an imaginary older brother or sister who will look out for them.
  667. The heart of marriage is memories; and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from the gods.
  668. The main goal of the future is to stop violence. The world is addicted to it.
  669. The most important educational vehicle in all life is a parent figure.
  670. The past is a ghost, the future a dream, and all we ever have is now.
  671. The problems with kids having short attention spans is driven by entertainment, reset buttons on games, games having to do with getting somewhere and heads blowing up. Everything is ‘cut to the chase, cut to the chase.’
  672. The truth is that parents are not really interested in justice. They just want quiet.
  673. There are certain times of the day when you need a balance – that is, your protein and your carbs. I’m a Barry Sears man. I believe that anything green is a carb, and I need 2:1. Two of the carbs to one of the protein.
  674. There are some people who have trouble recognizing a mess.
  675. There are teachers in the United States who cry in the daytime because they see a child or children who haven’t eaten properly, children who haven’t used soap in so long.
  676. There are times my stories become – what I feel – not only accessible to hearing me on television, but they make wonderful reading.
  677. There are two sides to every story, and sometimes three, four, and five.
  678. There is hope for the future because God has a sense of humor and we are funny to God.
  679. There is no job a man can do that is undignified – if he does it well.
  680. There is no labor a person does that is undignified; if they do it right.
  681. There should be marches in every neighborhood every day telling the people about the negativity of drugs and how the drugs help us to behave negatively.
  682. There should be more on television that uplifts people and shows them how to better prepare themselves for earning a living.
  683. There’s a gap between people knowing what I do and really believing that I still do that – and wondering what it is I really do.
  684. There’s no tradition today except initials, ‘CSI,’ ‘NCIS,’ all the rest. Even with reruns today, people don’t know there was a ‘Dick Van Dyke Show,’ or ‘Andy Griffith,’ or ‘Cheers.’
  685. Things are old. Parts are old. I’m talking about ‘us’ parts. AARP-parts. Some of us were born with stronger parts than others.
  686. Things from real life are the things that get people laughing.
  687. Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.
  688. Tons of comedians have said, ‘I grew up learning from Bill Cosby. He’s great.’ But that respect doesn’t mean much to the young people. They like their ginger ale with hot sauce.
  689. Too many people are waiting for Jesus to come along and cut your grass. And Jesus isn’t going to come along and cut your grass.
  690. We are all anxious to be accepted. But if you have a strong mother and father who tell you that you don’t have to dress a crazy way, or hang out with people who are looking for trouble in order to be loved and accepted, then half the battle is over.
  691. We’re not raising children with the love that we need to.
  692. We’ve got to get the gun out of the hands of people who are supposed to be on neighborhood watch.
  693. We’ve got too many young girls, who don’t know how to parent, turning themselves into parents.
  694. What kept me out of trouble is going right to the edge and then… thinking that my mother would be embarrassed, and that I didn’t want to embarrass her, and that my father would be embarrassed, and I just didn’t want to do that to my family.
  695. What people are tired of, the people who agree with me, what they’re tired of is listening to that sound, the sound of the people who’ve given up.
  696. What we need is for people to realize – ‘I want to raise my kid. I want to go back and get my three kids. I want to take on that responsibility. I want to love my children.’
  697. When I decided that I wanted to go to college, I wanted to be a school teacher for 7th and 8th grade boys because I felt that was an important time for them. I had gone astray at that point in my life and really wanted to help keep them from making the same mistake I had made.
  698. When I look at 55 percent of our black men dropping out of school, how bad off are we going to be when we need some lawyers?
  699. When I say, I don’t care what white people think, I mean that.
  700. When I was a boy if a girl got pregnant the shame was placed on her and the boy could get away.
  701. When I was a child, I was living in the housing projects of Philadelphia. I didn’t even have a Christmas tree.
  702. When a person has a gun, sometimes their mind clicks that this thing will win arguments and straighten people out.
  703. When my son was murdered, people asked me how I felt about God and what had happened to my son. I said, ‘No, you can’t go there. You have to understand that there is a devil, and he works 24/7. Whoever murdered our son was with the devil.’
  704. When you become senile, you won’t know it.
  705. When you carry a gun, you mean to harm somebody, kill somebody.
  706. When you don’t understand something, you often laugh.
  707. When you introduce competition into the public school system, most studies show that schools start to do better when they are competing for students.
  708. With my wife Camille’s help, I took to social networking. I’m working with the computers.
  709. Women don’t want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think – in a deeper voice.
  710. You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.
  711. You can’t compete with Walmart. But you can have smaller businesses that are successful.
  712. You can’t prove somebody is a racist unless they really come out and do the act and is found to be that.
  713. You come to my comedy show to be entertained.
  714. You don’t know what you’re going to fall in love with until you’re exposed to it.
  715. You don’t reinvent yourself; you get better with what you do.
  716. You know the only people who are always sure about the proper way to raise children? Those who’ve never had any.
  717. A goal is not always meant to be reached, it often serves simply as something to aim at.
  718. A quick temper will make a fool of you soon enough.
  719. A wise man can learn more from a foolish question than a fool can learn from a wise answer.
  720. All fixed set patterns are incapable of adaptability or pliability. The truth is outside of all fixed patterns.
  721. Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and look for a successful personality and duplicate it.
  722. As you think, so shall you become.
  723. Ever since I was a child I have had this instinctive urge for expansion and growth. To me, the function and duty of a quality human being is the sincere and honest development of one’s potential.
  724. I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once, but I fear the man who has practiced one kick 10,000 times.
  725. I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine.
  726. If you always put limit on everything you do, physical or anything else. It will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them.
  727. If you love life, don’t waste time, for time is what life is made up of.
  728. If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you’ll never get it done.
  729. It’s not the daily increase but daily decrease. Hack away at the unessential.
  730. Knowledge will give you power, but character respect.
  731. Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable.
  732. Man, the living creature, the creating individual, is always more important than any established style or system.
  733. Mistakes are always forgivable, if one has the courage to admit them.
  734. Notice that the stiffest tree is most easily cracked, while the bamboo or willow survives by bending with the wind.
  735. Obey the principles without being bound by them.
  736. Real living is living for others.
  737. Showing off is the fool’s idea of glory.
  738. Take no thought of who is right or wrong or who is better than. Be not for or against.
  739. Take things as they are. Punch when you have to punch. Kick when you have to kick.
  740. The key to immortality is first living a life worth remembering.
  741. The less effort, the faster and more powerful you will be.
  742. The possession of anything begins in the mind.
  743. To hell with circumstances; I create opportunities.
  744. To know oneself is to study oneself in action with another person.
  745. To me, the extraordinary aspect of martial arts lies in its simplicity. The easy way is also the right way, and martial arts is nothing at all special; the closer to the true way of martial arts, the less wastage of expression there is.
  746. You just wait. I’m going to be the biggest Chinese Star in the world.
  747. You can’t get a cup of tea big enough or a book long enough to suit me.
  748. You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.
  749. Writing is like a ‘lust,’ or like ‘scratching when you itch.’ Writing comes as a result of a very strong impulse, and when it does come, I, for one, must get it out.
  750. With the possible exception of the equator, everything begins somewhere.
  751. When Christ died, He died for you individually just as much as if you’d been the only man in the world.
  752. What we call Man’s power over Nature turns out to be a power exercised by some men over other men with Nature as its instrument.
  753. What I call my ‘self’ now is hardly a person at all. It’s mainly a meeting place for various natural forces, desires, and fears, etcetera, some of which come from my ancestors, and some from my education, some perhaps from devils. The self you were really intended to be is something that lives not from nature but from God.
  754. We must show our Christian colors if we are to be true to Jesus Christ.
  755. We are what we believe we are.
  756. We are not living in a world where all roads are radii of a circle and where all, if followed long enough, will therefore draw gradually nearer and finally meet at the centre: rather in a world where every road, after a few miles, forks into two, and each of those into two again, and at each fork, you must make a decision.
  757. We all want progress, but if you’re on the wrong road, progress means doing an about-turn and walking back to the right road; in that case, the man who turns back soonest is the most progressive.
  758. This is one of the miracles of love: It gives a power of seeing through its own enchantments and yet not being disenchanted.
  759. Thirty was so strange for me. I’ve really had to come to terms with the fact that I am now a walking and talking adult.
  760. There is, hidden or flaunted, a sword between the sexes till an entire marriage reconciles them.
  761. There is no uncreated being except God. God has no opposite.
  762. There are two kinds of people: those who say to God, ‘Thy will be done,’ and those to whom God says, ‘All right, then, have it your way.’
  763. The task of the modern educator is not to cut down jungles, but to irrigate deserts.
  764. The safest road to hell is the gradual one – the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts.
  765. The real problem is not why some pious, humble, believing people suffer, but why some do not.
  766. The long, dull, monotonous years of middle-aged prosperity or middle-aged adversity are excellent campaigning weather for the devil.
  767. The future is something which everyone reaches at the rate of 60 minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is.
  768. Telling us to obey instinct is like telling us to obey ‘people.’ People say different things: so do instincts. Our instincts are at war… Each instinct, if you listen to it, will claim to be gratified at the expense of the rest.
  769. Some people write heavily, some write lightly. I prefer the light approach because I believe there is a great deal of false reverence about. There is too much solemnity and intensity in dealing with sacred matters; too much speaking in holy tones.
  770. Some people feel guilty about their anxieties and regard them as a defect of faith but they are afflictions, not sins. Like all afflictions, they are, if we can so take them, our share in the passion of Christ.
  771. Solemnity is proper in church, but things that are proper in church are not necessarily proper outside, and vice versa. For example, I can say a prayer while washing my teeth, but that does not mean I should wash my teeth in church.
  772. Satan, the leader or dictator of devils, is the opposite, not of God, but of Michael.
  773. Reason is the natural order of truth; but imagination is the organ of meaning.
  774. Real joy seems to me almost as unlike security or prosperity as it is unlike agony.
  775. Part of every misery is, so to speak, the misery’s shadow or reflection: the fact that you don’t merely suffer but have to keep on thinking about the fact that you suffer. I not only live each endless day in grief, but live each day thinking about living each day in grief.
  776. Of all tyrannies a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive.
  777. Nothing that you have not given away will ever be really yours.
  778. Nothing is more dangerous to one’s own faith than the work of an apologist. No doctrine of that faith seems to me so spectral, so unreal as one that I have just successfully defended in a public debate.
  779. No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.
  780. Miracles do not, in fact, break the laws of nature.
  781. Miracles are a retelling in small letters of the very same story which is written across the whole world in letters too large for some of us to see.
  782. Look for yourself, and you will find in the long run only hatred, loneliness, despair, rage, ruin, and decay. But look for Christ, and you will find Him, and with Him everything else thrown in.
  783. Long before history began we men have got together apart from the women and done things. We had time.
  784. Literature adds to reality, it does not simply describe it. It enriches the necessary competencies that daily life requires and provides; and in this respect, it irrigates the deserts that our lives have already become.
  785. Let’s pray that the human race never escapes from Earth to spread its iniquity elsewhere.
  786. Joy is the serious business of Heaven.
  787. It’s so much easier to pray for a bore than to go and see one.
  788. It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad.
  789. Integrity is doing the right thing, even when no one is watching.
  790. If you read history you will find that the Christians who did most for the present world were precisely those who thought most of the next. It is since Christians have largely ceased to think of the other world that they have become so ineffective in this.
  791. If you look for truth, you may find comfort in the end; if you look for comfort you will not get either comfort or truth only soft soap and wishful thinking to begin, and in the end, despair.
  792. If we cut up beasts simply because they cannot prevent us and because we are backing our own side in the struggle for existence, it is only logical to cut up imbeciles, criminals, enemies, or capitalists for the same reasons.
  793. If the whole universe has no meaning, we should never have found out that it has no meaning: just as, if there were no light in the universe and therefore no creatures with eyes, we should never know it was dark. Dark would be without meaning.
  794. If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world.
  795. I’m tall, fat, rather bald, red-faced, double-chinned, black-haired, have a deep voice, and wear glasses for reading.
  796. I think that all things, in their way, reflect heavenly truth, the imagination not least.
  797. I sometimes wonder whether all pleasures are not substitutes for joy.
  798. I gave in, and admitted that God was God.
  799. I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else.
  800. Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less.
  801. Humans are amphibians – half spirit and half animal. As spirits they belong to the eternal world, but as animals they inhabit time.
  802. How incessant and great are the ills with which a prolonged old age is replete.
  803. History isn’t just the story of bad people doing bad things. It’s quite as much a story of people trying to do good things. But somehow, something goes wrong.
  804. Has this world been so kind to you that you should leave with regret? There are better things ahead than any we leave behind.
  805. God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing.
  806. Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art… It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival.
  807. Failures, repeated failures, are finger posts on the road to achievement. One fails forward toward success.
  808. Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn.
  809. Everyone has noticed how hard it is to turn our thoughts to God when everything is going well with us… While what we call ‘our own life’ remains agreeable, we will not surrender it to Him. What, then, can God do in our interests but make ‘our own life’ less agreeable to us, and take away the plausible sources of false happiness?
  810. Even in literature and art, no man who bothers about originality will ever be original: whereas if you simply try to tell the truth (without caring twopence how often it has been told before) you will, nine times out of ten, become original without ever having noticed it.
  811. Eros will have naked bodies; Friendship naked personalities.
  812. Education without values, as useful as it is, seems rather to make man a more clever devil.
  813. Don’t use words too big for the subject. Don’t say ‘infinitely’ when you mean ‘very’; otherwise you’ll have no word left when you want to talk about something really infinite.
  814. Courage is not simply one of the virtues, but the form of every virtue at the testing point.
  815. Christianity, if false, is of no importance, and if true, of infinite importance. The only thing it cannot be is moderately important.
  816. Can a mortal ask questions which God finds unanswerable? Quite easily, I should think. All nonsense questions are unanswerable.
  817. Anthropomorphic animals, when taken out of narrative into actual visibility, always turn into buffoonery or nightmare.
  818. An explanation of cause is not a justification by reason.
  819. Always try to use the language so as to make quite clear what you mean and make sure your sentence couldn’t mean anything else.
  820. Always prefer the plain direct word to the long, vague one. Don’t implement promises, but keep them.
  821. Aim at heaven and you will get earth thrown in. Aim at earth and you get neither.
  822. Affection is responsible for nine-tenths of whatever solid and durable happiness there is in our lives.
  823. A young man who wishes to remain a sound atheist cannot be too careful of his reading.
  824. A man who is eating or lying with his wife or preparing to go to sleep in humility, thankfulness and temperance, is, by Christian standards, in an infinitely higher state than one who is listening to Bach or reading Plato in a state of pride.
  825. A man can no more diminish God’s glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word, ‘darkness’ on the walls of his cell.
  826. ‘The Lion’ all began with a picture of a faun carrying an umbrella and parcels in a snowy wood. This picture had been in my mind since I was about sixteen. Then one day, when I was about forty, I said to myself, ‘Let’s try to make a story about it.’
  827. ‘Good English’ is whatever educated people talk; so that what is good in one place or time would not be so in another.
  828. World belongs to humanity, not this leader, that leader or that king or prince or religious leader. World belongs to humanity.
  829. With realization of one’s own potential and self-confidence in one’s ability, one can build a better world.
  830. Whether you call it Buddhism or another religion, self-discipline, that’s important. Self-discipline with awareness of consequences.
  831. Whether one believes in a religion or not, and whether one believes in rebirth or not, there isn’t anyone who doesn’t appreciate kindness and compassion.
  832. Wherever I go meeting the public… spreading a message of human values, spreading a message of harmony, is the most important thing.
  833. Where ignorance is our master, there is no possibility of real peace.
  834. When you practice gratefulness, there is a sense of respect toward others.
  835. When you are discontent, you always want more, more, more. Your desire can never be satisfied. But when you practice contentment, you can say to yourself, ‘Oh yes – I already have everything that I really need.’
  836. When we meet real tragedy in life, we can react in two ways – either by losing hope and falling into self-destructive habits, or by using the challenge to find our inner strength. Thanks to the teachings of Buddha, I have been able to take this second way.
  837. We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves.
  838. We can live without religion and meditation, but we cannot survive without human affection.
  839. We all have to live together, so we might as well live together happily.
  840. Too much self-centered attitude, you see, brings, you see, isolation. Result: loneliness, fear, anger. The extreme self-centered attitude is the source of suffering.
  841. Today, more than ever before, life must be characterized by a sense of Universal responsibility, not only nation to nation and human to human, but also human to other forms of life.
  842. Today different ethnic groups and different nations come together due to common sense.
  843. This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is our temple; the philosophy is kindness.
  844. There is no need for temples, no need for complicated philosophies. My brain and my heart are my temples; my philosophy is kindness.
  845. There are techniques of Buddhism, such as meditation, that anyone can adopt. And, of course, there are Christian monks and nuns who already use Buddhist methods in order to develop their devotion, compassion, and ability to forgive.
  846. There are techniques of Buddhism, such as meditation, that anyone can adopt.
  847. The ultimate authority must always rest with the individual’s own reason and critical analysis.
  848. The roots of all goodness lie in the soil of appreciation for goodness.
  849. The purpose of our lives is to be happy.
  850. The important thing is that men should have a purpose in life. It should be something useful, something good.
  851. The best way to resolve any problem in the human world is for all sides to sit down and talk.
  852. The basic Buddhist stand on the question of equality between the genders is age-old. At the highest tantric levels, at the highest esoteric level, you must respect women: every woman.
  853. The Tibetan people will need to determine who the next reincarnation of the Dalai Lama is.
  854. The Dalai Lama is just a temporal leader of Tibet.
  855. The Chinese government wants me to say that for many centuries Tibet has been part of China. Even if I make that statement, many people would just laugh. And my statement will not change past history. History is history.
  856. Sometimes one creates a dynamic impression by saying something, and sometimes one creates as significant an impression by remaining silent.
  857. Some scientists believe climate change is the cause of unprecedented melting of the North Pole, and that effects these very uncertain weather patterns. I think we should listen to those scientists and experts.
  858. Some mischievous people always there. Last several thousand years, always there. In future, also.
  859. Sleep is the best meditation.
  860. Religion, any religion, no matter what sort of wonderful religion, never be universal. So now education is universal, so we have to sort of find ways and means through education system, from kindergarten up to university level, to make awareness these good things, the values, inner values.
  861. Physical comforts cannot subdue mental suffering, and if we look closely, we can see that those who have many possessions are not necessarily happy. In fact, being wealthy often brings even more anxiety.
  862. Out of 6 billion humans, the troublemakers are just a handful.
  863. Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can’t help them, at least don’t hurt them.
  864. Open-minded people tend to be interested in Buddhism because Buddha urged people to investigate things – he didn’t just command them to believe.
  865. One thing I want to make clear, as far as my own rebirth is concerned, the final authority is myself and no one else, and obviously not China’s Communists.
  866. Old friends pass away, new friends appear. It is just like the days. An old day passes, a new day arrives. The important thing is to make it meaningful: a meaningful friend – or a meaningful day.
  867. Of course, when I say that human nature is gentleness, it is not 100 percent so. Every human being has that nature, but there are many people acting against their nature, being false.
  868. Number of people have said to me, after hearing your thinking, their mind becomes much more happier.
  869. My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness.
  870. My main hope is eventually, in modern education field, introduce education about warm-heartedness, not based on religion, but based on common experience and a common sort of sense, and then scientific finding.
  871. My main concern is meeting with public because my main commitment, main interest is promotion of human value, human affection, compassion and religious harmony.
  872. My faith helps me overcome such negative emotions and find my equilibrium.
  873. My desire to devolve authority has nothing to do with a wish to shirk responsibility.
  874. My aim is to create a happy society with genuine friendship. Friendship between Tibetan and Chinese peoples is very essential.
  875. More compassionate mind, more sense of concern for other’s well-being, is source of happiness.
  876. Many Tibetans sacrifice their lives.
  877. Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them humanity cannot survive.
  878. Look at situations from all angles, and you will become more open.
  879. Logically, harmony must come from the heart… Harmony very much based on trust. As soon as use force, creates fear. Fear and trust cannot go together.
  880. It is very important to generate a good attitude, a good heart, as much as possible. From this, happiness in both the short term and the long term for both yourself and others will come.
  881. It is necessary to help others, not only in our prayers, but in our daily lives. If we find we cannot help others, the least we can do is to desist from harming them.
  882. It is difficult to violently suppress people in the long run, as the example of the Soviet Union and the Eastern European countries has shown.
  883. In the practice of tolerance, one’s enemy is the best teacher.
  884. In order to carry a positive action we must develop here a positive vision.
  885. In order to become prosperous, a person must initially work very hard, so he or she has to sacrifice a lot of leisure time.
  886. In most cases, my visits to the West are for promotion of human values and religious harmony.
  887. If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.
  888. If you have religious faith, very good, you can add on secular ethics, then religious belief, add on it, very good. But even those people who have no interest about religion, okay, it’s not religion, but you can train through education.
  889. If you have a particular faith or religion, that is good. But you can survive without it.
  890. If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them.
  891. If some people have the belief or view that the Dalai Lama has some miracle power, that’s totally nonsense. I am just one human being.
  892. If some people have the belief or view that the Dalai Lama has some miracle power, that’s totally nonsense.
  893. If I had remained in Lhasa, even without the Chinese occupation, I would probably have carried the ceremonial role in some orthodox way.
  894. I want to be just a pure spiritual leader.
  895. I totally disagree with the view that the Tibet struggle will die, and there will be no hope for Tibet, after the Dalai Lama passes away.
  896. I think there’s every reason this 21st century will be much happier.
  897. I think the self-burning itself on practice of non-violence. These people, you see, they easily use bomb explosive, more casualty people. But they didn’t do that. Only sacrifice their own life. So this also is part of practice of non-violence.
  898. I think technology really increased human ability. But technology cannot produce compassion.
  899. I think really, China, Chinese, I think they really have a long history of civilization, rich culture.
  900. I think governments can’t do much.
  901. I never dreamt, in my dream, I’m Dalai Lama.
  902. I have no trouble sleeping.
  903. I have done one thing that I think is a contribution: I helped Buddhist science and modern science combine. No other Buddhist has done that. Other lamas, I don’t think they ever pay attention to modern science. Since my childhood, I have a keen interest.
  904. I have always had this view about the modern education system: we pay attention to brain development, but the development of warmheartedness we take for granted.
  905. I find hope in the darkest of days, and focus in the brightest. I do not judge the universe.
  906. I felt we must separate political responsibility. The Dalai Lama should not carry that burden. So that is my selfish reason – to protect the old Dalai Lama tradition. It is safer without political involvement.
  907. I feel exhausted if I teach too long.
  908. I don’t think generally politician come from democratic country. I think not that thinking. But sometimes little bit short-sighted. They are mainly looking for their next vote.
  909. I describe myself as a simple Buddhist monk. No more, no less.
  910. I consider myself as a free spokesman for the people.
  911. I became the Dalai Lama not on a volunteer basis.
  912. I am sometimes sad when I hear the personal stories of Tibetan refugees who have been tortured or beaten. Some irritation, some anger comes. But it never lasts long. I always try to think at a deeper level, to find ways to console.
  913. I am just one human being.
  914. I am confident I will set foot again in Tibet in my lifetime.
  915. I am a simple Buddhist monk – no more, no less.
  916. I always tell people that religious institutions and political institutions should be separate. So while I’m telling people this, I myself continue with them combined. Hypocrisy!
  917. I always say that people should not rush to change religions. There is real value in finding the spiritual resources you need in your home religion.
  918. I always believe the rule by king or official leader is outdated. Now we must catch up with the modern world.
  919. Home is where you feel at home and are treated well.
  920. Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.
  921. Generally speaking, if a human being never shows anger, then I think something’s wrong. He’s not right in the brain.
  922. Even when we have physical hardships, we can be very happy.
  923. Even when a person has all of life’s comforts – good food, good shelter, a companion – he or she can still become unhappy when encountering a tragic situation.
  924. Even an animal, if you show genuine affection, gradually trust develops… If you always showing bad face and beating, how can you develop friendship?
  925. Disagreement is something normal.
  926. Death means change our clothes. Clothes become old, then time to come change. So this body become old, and then time come, take young body.
  927. Conversion is not my intention. Changing religion is not easy. You may develop some kind of confusion or difficulties.
  928. Computers make me totally blank out.
  929. Chinese people themselves, they really want change.
  930. China has to go along with world trends. That’s democracy, liberty, individual freedom. China sooner or later has to go that way. It cannot go backward.
  931. Calm mind brings inner strength and self-confidence, so that’s very important for good health.
  932. Because of lack of moral principle, human life becomes worthless. Moral principle, truthfulness, is a key factor. If we lose that, then there is no future.
  933. Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.
  934. At the beginning when the child is coming, people worry the child may be deformed. When a healthy boy or child comes, people are very happy for a short moment.
  935. As long as I am alive, I am fully committed to amity between Tibetans and Chinese. Otherwise there’s no use.
  936. As a human being, anger is a part of our mind. Irritation also part of our mind. But you can do – anger come, go. Never keep in your sort of – your inner world, then create a lot of suspicion, a lot of distrust, a lot of negative things, more worry.
  937. Appearance is something absolute, but reality is not that way – everything is interdependent, not absolute. So that view is very helpful to maintain a peace of mind because the main destroyer of a peaceful mind is anger.
  938. Appearance is something absolute, but reality is not that way – everything is interdependent, not absolute.
  939. All religions try to benefit people, with the same basic message of the need for love and compassion, for justice and honesty, for contentment.
  940. All major religious traditions carry basically the same message, that is love, compassion and forgiveness the important thing is they should be part of our daily lives.
  941. A lack of transparency results in distrust and a deep sense of insecurity.
  942. Where much is expected from an individual, he may rise to the level of events and make the dream come true.
  943. We work to become, not to acquire.
  944. We awaken in others the same attitude of mind we hold toward them.
  945. We are punished by our sins, not for them.
  946. We are not punished for our sins, but by them.
  947. To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing.
  948. This will never be a civilized country until we spend more money for books than we do for chewing gum.
  949. There is something that is much more scarce, something finer far, something rarer than ability. It is the ability to recognize ability.
  950. There is no failure except in no longer trying.
  951. The world is moving so fast these days that the man who says it can’t be done is generally interrupted by someone doing it.
  952. The thing we fear we bring to pass.
  953. The teacher is the one who gets the most out of the lessons, and the true teacher is the learner.
  954. The supernatural is the natural not yet understood.
  955. The sculptor produces the beautiful statue by chipping away such parts of the marble block as are not needed – it is a process of elimination.
  956. The recipe for perpetual ignorance is: Be satisfied with your opinions and content with your knowledge.
  957. The reason men oppose progress is not that they hate progress, but that they love inertia.
  958. The only foes that threaten America are the enemies at home, and these are ignorance, superstition and incompetence.
  959. The object of teaching a child is to enable him to get along without his teacher.
  960. The man who knows it can’t be done counts the risk, not the reward.
  961. The man who has no problems is out of the game.
  962. The love we give away is the only love we keep.
  963. The line between failure and success is so fine that we scarcely know when we pass it: so fine that we are often on the line and do not know it.
  964. The ineffable joy of forgiving and being forgiven forms an ecstasy that might well arouse the envy of the gods.
  965. The idea that is not dangerous is not worthy of being called an idea at all.
  966. The highest reward that God gives us for good work is the ability to do better work.
  967. The happiness of this life depends less on what befalls you than the way in which you take it.
  968. The greatest mistake you can make in life is continually fearing that you’ll make one.
  969. The final proof of greatness lies in being able to endure criticism without resentment.
  970. The church saves sinners, but science seeks to stop their manufacture.
  971. The best preparation for good work tomorrow is to do good work today.
  972. So long as governments set the example of killing their enemies, private individuals will occasionally kill theirs.
  973. Secrets are things we give to others to keep for us.
  974. Reversing your treatment of the man you have wronged is better than asking his forgiveness.
  975. Responsibility is the price of freedom.
  976. Pray that success will not come any faster than you are able to endure it.
  977. Positive anything is better than negative nothing.
  978. Polygamy: An endeavour to get more out of life than there is in it.
  979. Our desires always disappoint us; for though we meet with something that gives us satisfaction, yet it never thoroughly answers our expectation.
  980. Optimism is a kind of heart stimulant – the digitalis of failure.
  981. One machine can do the work of fifty ordinary men. No machine can do the work of one extraordinary man.
  982. Often we can help each other most by leaving each other alone; at other times we need the hand-grasp and the word of cheer.
  983. No one ever gets far unless he accomplishes the impossible at least once a day.
  984. Never get married in college; it’s hard to get a start if a prospective employer finds you’ve already made one mistake.
  985. Never explain – your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe you anyway.
  986. Men are only as great as they are kind.
  987. Many a man’s reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.
  988. Love, we say, is life; but love without hope and faith is agonizing death.
  989. Love grows by giving. The love we give away is the only love we keep. The only way to retain love is to give it away.
  990. Live truth instead of professing it.
  991. Little minds are interested in the extraordinary; great minds in the commonplace.
  992. Life is just one damned thing after another.
  993. Life in abundance comes only through great love.
  994. Know what you want to do, hold the thought firmly, and do every day what should be done, and every sunset will see you that much nearer to your goal.
  995. It’s pretty hard to be efficient without being obnoxious.
  996. It may happen sometimes that a long debate becomes the cause of a longer friendship. Commonly, those who dispute with one another at last agree.
  997. It is easy to get everything you want, provided you first learn to do without the things you cannot get.
  998. It does not take much strength to do things, but it requires great strength to decide on what to do.
  999. Initiative is doing the right things without being told.
  1000. In order to have friends, you must first be one.

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